An Elective C-section Birth - Laura's Story

(6 minute read)

An Elective C-section Birth - Laura's Story

After being told by a medical professional over 10 years ago that I couldn’t carry another baby ever again and my chances of even getting pregnant were slim to none so not to even bother trying and then having cervical cancer a few years later, I gave up all hope and was devastated.

Then I met my now husband. We had that chat about children very early on and we both already had children from previous marriages. We decided that with my infertility and our ages that we just wanted to stick with our family as it was, then I found out I was pregnant.

I could not believe it and took 5 tests and 2 clear blue digital tests - even then it was still hard to get my head round. I called my best friend in tears and spent the next hour panicking how I was going to tell my husband especially after our conversation the other day. She calmed me down and I went to speak to him. After a few choice censored words (in a nice way) he knew how important this baby would be to me and how much of a miracle this was and told me that despite not wanting any more, not doing this wasn’t an option given my history. He held my hand and told me it would be just fine.

Skip forward to our first scan on my birthday and I prayed and cried to see a heartbeat having previously had the trauma of losing two babies after my daughter.

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And no sooner had the sonographer showed me, ‘little blip’ was alive and growing well at 5weeks plus 6. I breathed a huge sigh of relief and the tears flowed that it was actually real.

Then anxiety kicked in. Massively. Every scan moving forward started with me in sheer panic and tears. I worried I wouldn’t see a heartbeat and this dream wouldn’t last. I’d lost my previous 2 babies at 7 and 8 weeks gestation. With each scan, we saw our baby grow and grow and shape into a potiential future. I couldn’t believe it and slept with a towel between my legs just in case I started bleeding like I had done twice before.

Then we made it to 12 weeks and everything was still fine. The anxiety lessened but was still evident at every appointment. So I was offered extra scans at the hospital and referred to Lotus Outreach team and Perinatal community mental health team.

They were a Godsend. Lotus helped me shape my anxiety into one hour at a time and enjoy the good days when I felt them and sit with the bad days when my anxiety and fear clouded me.

Fast forward to finding out the starting gender of our baby. We made it this far and I bravely discussed names for both genders with my husband and daughter. I was told as well years ago I’d never carry a boy either. Well, lo and behold, a boy it was! I immediately called my daughter and asked if the name she had chosen was the one she wanted for him. It was and we kept it as much of a secret as we both could.

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We got past the miscarriage probability stage and I then started worrying about stillbirth. I still couldn’t let my heart accept that things might just work out. My husband banned me from Google searching and we agreed with the consultant at the hospital that I would go forward with an induction. I just wanted my baby here, alive.

I regularly visited the maternity assessment unit for reassurance that his heart was still beating and he was still healthy. One day after being monitored for an hour I begged them for an ultrasound as something just didn’t feel right. We found out our baby had ventricularmalagy. He was showing enlarged ventricles on the left part of his brain. It was a mild case but I still fell apart. My husband held me as I cried for hours and I didn’t want to leave the hospital for fear the baby wouldn’t make it over the weekend. I was comforted and reassured by the midwife that he would be okay and she wouldn’t send me home if she was worried. I took her word for it and went home with an appointment booked for the Monday morning with the fetal specialist team. They confirmed his diagnosis and again reassured me that although they could intervene now with tests, the baby would be perfectly safe and born alive and could wait until he was born to have an ultrasound on his head. The consultant was brilliant and knew everything there was to know about ventricularmalgy.

Well, we made it to 38 weeks. I started the induction process and stayed in hospital. The midwives were brilliant and held my hand every step of the way. After 3 days, my body just didn’t respond to the induction methods. I was getting tired and stressed and even the baby showed mild signs he’d had enough too. I had a conversation with my husband and we agreed to ask for an emergency c section. It wasn’t what I wanted at all but it was my only choice that I felt better with if it meant having my baby safe and alive. The midwives wrote on a white board all the facts relating to the c section to help me process it in the short space of time I had to come to terms with what would happen. My husband repeated to me that it was just another way to have a baby and the anxiety and fear melted away and I calmed down just in time.

After what seemed like hours (which was only minutes) I heard the cry I had been dreaming of hearing for the past 9 months. My beautiful son was here. Alive. Safe. My husband took the reins and looked after him while I lay there losing 1.9 litres of blood and thinking I was going to die. I remember saying to save the baby and not me. I had to have a blood transfusion and I came around just in time to see my husband and our son sitting next to me.

 

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